Mom Village
Building an army of moms one meditation group at a time
Three years ago I created Mom Village from a place of desperation. I found myself isolated with a one-year-old during a global pandemic and losing my shit. I selfishly created the offering that I needed to receive: a meditation and Sensory Awareness group for mothers, where we gather together and drop all the bullshit, tap into our ability to relax deeply, and share our powerful voices together, creating hope, friendship, and inspiration. I still need this. As a birth doula I’ve known for a long time that isolation in motherhood is a recipe for depression and anxiety. This was true before our global shut-down and it’s even more important now.
I wanted a place where I could come together with other moms and feel my body and the truth of my own soul again. A soul revival, if you will. I wanted a mom’s group where we didn’t just talk about our babies, diaper brands, or the next sleep-training fad. I wanted to feel myself again while being witnessed and held in community. Growing up Zen Buddhist, I’ve experienced the magic that’s created when we come together in community (Sangha) around a meditation and movement practice, how we feed off the delicious energy that’s created together as a group. I love this feeling, when a group of people are noticing the sensations of their bodies and slowing down the thoughts in their minds until all that’s left is the core essence; the place of wisdom, passion, and truth. I love this feeling in stillness and I love it in movement.
I never imagined I’d be teaching virtually and I didn’t think I’d enjoy it. I figured I would offer this gathering online until we could meet in person and then only do that. What I discovered is that I love meeting virtually and although it can never replace meeting in-person, it’s a wonderful addition, especially during pregnancy and for moms with little ones (like me!). You can pee in your own bathroom as many times as you want. All your own snacks are available and there’s no need to dress anyone or get loaded up in car-seats. Best of all it allows us to find a sense of the sacred in our own homes, in our own bodies.
Now I have a 6-month-old baby as well as a 4-year-old and being able to lead this group from home allows me to have child-care for the baby without needing to schedule in travel time for both kids. This way I have time to go for a run or take a nap, which are essential parts of my life right now. It’s amazing to be able to go into our back room, light a candle, open my laptop, take some deep breaths, and welcome the amazing witchy women who join me from all over, to light ourselves up.
It started out as a desperate plea to help each other relax and has turned into a place to grow empowerment and passion. We dream together and build each other up. I’m imagining creating an Army of Moms where we fight for our rights as mothers: our right to autonomy over our own bodies and births experiences, our right to paid parental time off, our right to affordable good quality childcare for the first 5 years of our children’s lives. These things are essential and it’s going to take a lot of us to make these changes. It’s completely backwards that our developed country is so behind in these ways.
I want to live in a world where mother’s believe that our lives matter, not just the lives of our babies. Our birth experiences matter. Our happiness matters. Our ability to experience pleasure and joy matters. As mothers we need support to relax and enjoy our lives. Meditation and Sensory Awareness practices are tools to help us do this.
Motherhood is not a deficit or a demotion. Becoming a mother, going through the enormous gauntlet of pregnancy, birth, and the intensity of keeping tiny people alive, and guiding them towards health and happiness is huge important work. This work puts us at the forefront of humanity’s future. Yet somehow most of us seem to be dis-empowered and running around like chickens with our heads cut off; so busy that we’ve lost touch with our own bodies and what we love about being alive.
We’ve been duped into believing that we are not important, that care-taking is not important work. But it is! It’s the most important work there is. Nannies, teachers, babysitters, and families are crucial to the well being of our planet and we need to change our systems, our policies, to reflect that. (Please comment below with ideas of how to do this!!!)
When we take the time to slow down and regulate our nervous systems with meditation practices and Sensory Awareness, we give ourselves the tools to notice what is needed and respond. We practice noticing when we are de-regulated and tell ourselves, “Don’t make any decisions from this place.” We practice coming back to our center and making changes from here. This is how our children learn to regulate their nervous systems too. Can you imagine living in a world where most people are relaxed and healthy?
It starts with mothers. It starts with taking care of babies, mothers, and families. This is the only way.
Join us! Mom Village starts up again September 19
If you or your partner is pregnant check out Meditation for Birth to prepare for an empowering birth experience and the tools to relax into early motherhood.
Feel free to share a comment below! How do we make these changes to support mothers, babies, and families? What tools have worked for you to find deep relaxation, pleasure, community, or empowerment?